Do Victims Of Domestic Violence Get The Help They Need?
When I was a victim of domestic violence I thought that I would get the help that I needed. But unfortunately almost every time I reached out for help I felt like I was getting slapped in the face. Instead of the help and support I needed I felt like was just getting more accusations and blame.
No one seems to understand what victims of domestic abuse go through. When I would tell people about the abuse I went through I got comments like, “Why did you allow him to speak to you like that?” I felt like I was being blamed for the abuse.
I was wondering how on earth do I have the power to control any one else’s actions? Do I have the power to control an adult male? I did not.
When my ex-partner criticized me I would fight back by defending myself with words. I would tell him to stop what he was doing. But he would not stop. People would say, “Why don’t you just leave?”
Leave and go where? I did not have any family in the UK who was willing to help me. I had left those who cared about me in another country. In the end I had a friend help me find another place to rent and left without him knowing so he could not track me down. I was just thankful that I was working and had my own income.
It is not easy to leave when you are not sure of where you are going to go. I went to the police numerous times about his attacks and nothing was done until I got an injunction and he broke it. I went to various professionals for support and felt that they were just judging me.
I conducted a study of the experiences that victims of domestic violence have with social workers because I wanted to know if other people have experienced the chronic lack of support that victims of domestic abuse experience from professionals.
The book The System Sucks What Victims Of Domestic Violence Want You To Know is the result of this research.
If you want to know more about the experiences that victims of domestic abuse have with social workers read this book.